Froggie Translations

When it comes to men, I’m starting to feel as if I’ve heard it all. From personal experience to lamenting friends, there are some common lines out there. And really, I’m a smart chickie, I know what all the common phrases mean. I appreciate that guys don’t want to hurt my feelings, but sometime, I’d just like them to grow a pair and tell the truth. But then again, if they didn’t that, then they’d be an asshole. I guess it’s a catch 22.

Anywho, here are some common phrases and what I’m certain they mean. If I’m wrong, boys, feel free to correct me!

“I’m not really into porn / strippers / bachelor parties.” or “I read it for the articles.”

Riiight! Men generally have a thing for some part of the female anatomy (boobs, legs, ass…). I’m not going to call me liars, but I will point out that the sex industry makes millions every day. Coincidence? I think not. Translation: “I like boobies (or insert favorite body part here)!!.”

“I’ll call you.”

While it’s nice to think this means I’ll call you in a few days; the actual translation: “I’ll call you sometime before I die, maybe.”

“It’s complicated.”

It’s not really complicated. Translation: “I have a girlfriend but I want to sleep with you, too.”
“Let’s talk about it later.”

Translation: “I’m uncomfortable with this conversation. Let’s talk about this NEVER!! I’m only saying ‘later’ in the hopes that you will forget.”

“She’s just a friend”

She probably is a “friend”…but one he also occasionally sleeps with. Or the “friend” is not good enough to be a girlfriend…but he doesn’t want to end things with her completely in case things don’t work out with you. If you’re either woman…get out of there!!

“Let’s just see where this goes.”

Translation: “I’m just lookin’ for a booty call.”

“It’s not you, it’s me.”

Translation: “I’m just not that into you.” And he’s a looser! Move on!!

"I'd never lie to you."

Did you not just read the last few statements?!?!

To be fair, I suppose it goes both ways. Let’s face it. Women are rarely just “fine”; we do mind if you go to a strip club; we are ready for a relationship, just not with you; and oh yeah, size does matter.