From the list of top five things that freak me out...

It's getting to be that time of year, and they're starting to appear. I see them in stores, as decorations, one has even infiltrated Julia's desk at work and she wants it to gasp! give her kisses!! Sure, some of you may think they're harmless, maybe even cute--but they freak me out!!

What is this terrible thing?-- SNOWMEN

Why, you may ask?

Well first of all, when I was a kid, there was an incident where an excessively large 9 ft. snowman nearly fell on me, almost crushing a 4 year old Bethie. It was traumatic!! Furthermore, anytime I had made snowmen prior to this time they all had fro's--That's right...big puffy hair--like a clown (see ya'll who are freaked out by clowns are starting to get on board now, aren't ya?).

Secondly, if I wanted to be around a cold man with slush for brains, I'd still be dating one of my ex's.

Third they have these little beady eyes. It's creepy. Sometimes their "eyes made out of coal" appear to be following you.

Next, let's talk about them melting. It's just gross! And in neighborhoods where there are very few trees, there's always a melted area at the base that's yellow from the dogs. Ick!

Moving on, have you seen the Campbell's Soup commercial where one melts off of a little boy? EW!! The only marketing message that was sent to me was to keep soup in my cupboard to ward of snowmen. Apparently, soup is snowman kryptonite.

Finally, let's call a spade a spade--they're these big inanimate objects that when you dress them up, they start dancing around all willy-nilly! That's just not natural, they don't even have legs! I don't trust 'em. I mean why is it in one movie when things start flying around a house chasing after a little blond girl it's called a poltergeist and when it's a snowman chasing a little blond girl through the town it's called Frosty, the holiday classic? Hellooo!

I know I'm not the only one. I found the Snowmen Hunter's website. I'm sure there must be more. Maybe I need to start a group... I like SHOE--Snowmen Haters On Edge? At least it spells a word. Anywho, until I can figure out something better, keep the snowmen away from me!