That time of year...

That's right, it's that time of year when the gym is flooded with all those fakers, who made New Years Resolutions to get back in to shape, crowding my gym and taking up my machines. Now I have no problem with people at the gym. But I do have a problem with the fact that this should be a lifestyle, not something of convenience. If these people truly wanted to be in shape, I'd see them in July too!

But I digress. Along with the hordes of out of shape couch potato's comes with a whole host of people who just don't know how to behave at they gym. I swear, it's ridiculous!! In the past 2 weeks, I've witnessed more than necessary, including:

1. The naked people are back. Yep, the ones who think it's cool to lounge about the locker room naked or scarcely clothed talking on their cell phones or just generally prancing about. And trust me, they're not the people any one wants to see naked.
2. The people who don't know how to work the treadmills. Ok, these people really don't annoy me. When they fall off, it's kinda funny. (I can laugh, it's happened to me!)
3. The people who are lost. My trainer was stretching me out near the large windows over looking the pool. Some guy came over and asked him where the pool was!! He pointed behind him to the large body of water. Then the guy asked, "How do I get in?" Hector pointed to the door (just a few feet away) and also mentioned that there was a door through the locker room.
4. People who talk loudly on their cell phones while they are using the machines. If you're going that slowly on the machine, you need to get off the phone and amp it up!! Also, I don't care about the gossip in your world (really? you slept with this heinous guy last night?!), nor do I think you should give mileage reports from your treadmill while you are walking.
5. Couples who make out. I was on the stair stepper and this couple got off the machines in front of me and proceeded to make out. I saw tongue...and much more than I wanted to see. To make things worse, they wouldn't stop! I had to get off the stair machine, it was that bad.
6. Excessive cologne. I shouldn't smell you for 5 minutes after you've walked by.
7. The people who just hang out near machines. They're not actually doing anything. I think they just go to the gym to say that they've gone to the gym that day.
8. On a similar note there's the people who stare. They just stare at you while you're on a machine or working out. I don't get it. It's just creepy!
9. Those who turn the gym into a meat market. I go to the gym to work out. Not to socialize, not to pick up men. TO WORK OUT. I don't want some guy to be 'hanging out' just to hit on me when I get off the treadmill.
10. Creepy, hair guys in the whirlpool. I hate that they're sitting there gawking when I swim laps. No, I don't need you to count for me, and no, I didn't turn my head while swimming to talk to you. It's called breathing. I guess maybe, in this case, drowning would have been the better option.

Can you tell I'm annoyed? I wouldn't mind the extra crowd if I didn't have to put up with these offenses. I've been heading to the gym before work, just to avoid the people and the problems. I can't wait until these people give up and go back to their couches.