The can is open and the worms are everywhere!

The Ressies are Back

2012-01-02T16:01:00.003-06:00

I went to the gym this morning to find it crawling with Resolutionists or "Ressies". What is a "Ressie"? The "ressies" are a rude breed of people who feel the need to make a "lifestyle change" at the start of a New Year, but eventually stop coming to the gym after a month.

While I do agree that having a healthy lifestyle is important, I also think that people need to have proper decorum at the gym. That's where the rudeness comes in. If these "ressies" were at the gym all the time they would know the procedures and be on a set schedule. I would come at a different, non-peak time of day. I don't care that there are other people at the gym. I care that people choose to prance about like their in their own homes. For example, standing on the sides of the treadmill because you're too winded to continue while there's people waiting is just plain rude. Walking about naked in the locker room and popping pimples/picking at your skin in the mirror (yes, she was naked--and should NOT have been) is gross. Telling someone that they have placed their coat in the wrong locker is just ridiculous (happened to me today!).

I have to admit, I did go to the gym at a different time than I usually do. It is possible that some think I'm a "ressie" because I'm usually not there at 9:00 am in the morning. My usual time is actually 3 or 4 hours earlier.

Because I'm poo-pooing on the "ressies" resolutions, I would like to offer the "ressies" a list of alternate resolutions. Ones that wouldn't annoy the crap out of regular gym-goers, and these might actually be attainable. Here are 10 suggestions, in no particular order:

Bethie's List of Attainible New Years Resolutions

1) Resolve to purchase exercise DVD's. This is a win-win for everyone. a) DVD's are cheaper than the cost of a gym membership. b) You won't clog up the gym. c) When you get sick of the DVD's, you can trade them with other "ressies". Finally, d) this resolution only states that you will purchase the DVD's, it does not state that you actually have to work out to one.

2) Resolve to walk more. This one gets you moving and off the couch. It's easy. Take one step. Take another. Repeat. See? Told you it was easy. It will reduce carbon emissions from driving. Also, if people in the Chicago-land area are walking more, they can avoid the new craptastic fees that have come into place in 2012 including; Increased parking rates, increased rates on parking meters, increased city stickers and increased tolls.

3) Resolve to read more. Like my blog. (Shameless plug)

4) Resolve to become "A Person of Mystery". You don't actually have to do much, you just have to keep your mouth shut (ok, this one could be hard for a lot of people). One way to do this is to hide from people and cease communication. Another is to not walk around naked at the gym with your 40 year old breasts flapping about. (Clearly, I'm still scared from this morning.)

5) Resolve to avoid Barracudas. It just makes sense, those things are mean!

6) Resolve to put peanut butter on more things. If your allergic, try almond butter or Nutella... Hmm...put peanut butter on Nutella...

7) Resolve to be nice and friendly. Nobody likes an asshole. This would be a much better world if people stopped running their mouths, took a deep breath and just let things go or took a walk to blow off steam (see option #2 for walking details and benefits).

8) Resolve to catch up on your correspondence. Go to the post office, buy some stamps. Send people letters through snail-mail. Everyone loves mail that's not a bill! What? You don't know what to write? Send a thank you note (people should show more gratitude anyway). Or go to Hallmark. They have postage paid cards and post cards now. All you have to do is sign your name and address it. Easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy! The US Post Office has had to make cut-backs due to email and the internet. You'd be helping the economy by saving (or even creating) a postal employee's job. Doesn't that make you feel all warm and fuzzy?

9) On the list of not so fuzzy resolutions (hey, I needed one for the slightly evil readers), Resolve to help others break their resolutions. Again, slightly evil, but fun! This one keeps not only you, but other "ressies" out of the gym. Use this time to bond, plot ways to get others out of their resolutions (most people fail anyway), or get some hot chocolate.

10) Resolve not to make any more resolutions. When people ask why, tell them that you love your awesome-self just the way you are and that you don't need to change.

If you haven't made a resolution yet, I hope this helps you choose one. If you've made a resolution to run a marathon, awesome (If it's a fall one, you don't have to start training until June). If you've resolved to make a "lifestyle change", I hope this gives you an option for something immediately satisfying and allows you to wait until the gym clears out to get yourself in shape.

I'm ba-a-ack!

2012-01-01T19:15:00.003-06:00

*tap-tap*

Is this thing on?

Wha?! Bethie blogging again? Crazy!

Ok, it's been a while. First of all, unless some random froggie heads my way, the Frog Chronicles are disappearing. That's right...I've found my prince and I'm getting married in June. Wedding plans are underway (know any good photographers?).

Last January, I was injured and had to take 2011 off from running. It sucked. I was fat and depressed. However, I've dropped my injury weight and am back to running again. Fingers crossed that my fiancé will let me run a marathon on our honeymoon. ;)

Still teaching, although sadly it's Science and not Art.

Seamus the Wondercat has been (unhappily) joined by Duke, an 85 lb. Weimarweiner.

Hmmm... Can I really sum up almost 2 years in a few sentences? I guess, if you have questions you can ask, it will give me something to blog about!

An Open Letter to All Froggies:

2010-04-28T12:31:00.000-05:00

Hello, Froggies. Let’s chat about trying to kiss a chickie. There are several things to conceder before you try to get your mack on.

First and most important, ask yourself “Does this woman want me to kiss her?” Most women will give you signs including but not limited to flirting, hair tossing, application of lip gloss or just telling you. Don’t do the ‘lean in’ on less you are sure.

Second; location, location, location. Whether we admit it or not, the majority of women are romantic at heart. If you haven’t previously kissed this woman, wouldn’t you want the first kiss to be memorable? Surveys have shown a bad first kiss can be a deal breaker. Therefore, it would not be a good idea to make an attempt in a parking lot, near a dumpster (or trash of any kind—do I look like Oscar the Grouch?) or on a personal note, while I’m watching sports. (You all know, my own mother doesn’t even call me when there’s a Bears game on!)

I would also like to say that persistence does not, in fact, pay off. If a woman isn’t interested, then she’s just not interested. If you try the ‘lean in’ and she doesn’t reciprocate, then do not try a third time. It just makes you seem even creepier. On the same note, if you try, get the head turn and plant one on her cheek, the same applies.

Finally, check yourself. Do you have anything stuck in your Froggie teeth? Do you smell like man or frog? Is your fly down? Are you a douchebag/Froggie? If you answered yes to any of the previous questions, just don’t do it…and please, stay away from me!

Thanks! <3 Bethie

The Froggies Know...

2010-04-09T22:58:00.003-05:00

Well, much to the delight of many a faithful reader it turns out I'm pretty much single again. It's a long and sad story I don't feel any need to get into at the moment. (But I'm sure I'll get to that ornery place where I'll feel the need to blog about it!) And so it seems, that the Froggies can sense my singleness and are back on my tail. In fact, were it not for the necessary submission of my boards (due in less than a week), I may have posted sooner.

So, without further ado, a quickie story for your pleasure (and my personal disgust):

I was at Walgreen's picking up a few items. Nothing major, just things that were on sale and for which I had coupons. (I know, bitchin' Friday night. I also have to point out that this was the third frog of the evening!) I was in the "girl product" isle trying to figure out if the sale with coupon was a better deal than the generic option when I notice this guy pass me not once, but three times. True there are other things in this isle but he was not pausing, rather circling. By the time I realized I was his prey it was too late. He came up to me and said "So, uh, you-um-uh, come here often?"

I just stared at him.

Really? Did you just ask that? What sort of response are you looking for? To the tampon isle? Yeah, about once a month.

Fortunately, (and at the risk of giving my wonderful readers too much information) no, Aunt Flo is not in town. So, I just grabbed what I needed and walked away. But I have to wonder, in the event I really were on the rag, would I have chewed this dude a new one? Did he really think that approaching a potentially pms-ing woman with that sort of line, in that location, was the best idea in the world?

Here's a tip, Froggies: If you're gonna hit on a woman who has the slightest chance of being hormonal wait until she's looking for chocolate or ice cream. And please, have a much better line.

The Bachelor (Drinking Game)

2010-01-04T20:44:00.003-06:00

Time for a new Bachelor...with the cat fights, tears and roses. Now, while I'm a complete and total love junkie, this show is all about the crazy. Therefore, I would like to share with you the drinking game Danielle and I have made up to play while watching this show. I give you:

The Bachelor Drinking Game

Every time they say the word "Rose".
Anytime Chris is Captain Obvious. (ie, "This is the final rose of the evening.")
Anytime there's tears or crazy.
Anytime some one claims to "be in love" or that they're "not here to make friends".
Whenever the Bachelor is confused about his choice.
Any time someone does or says something that could be used for a future restraining order.

Please, feel free to join us on Monday nights, because this is a prime example of the Hot/Crazy Scale. Enjoy!

Long Lost Froggies

2009-12-14T18:12:00.007-06:00

Hello Readers! I have some bad news and good news.

The good news is that I've started dating someone (Yeah for me!). The bad news is that we'll be loosing the Frog Chronicles (unless the boy does something stupid!). I do have some back posting to do, so there will be a few more entries. I also welcome the option for guest posts (come on ladies, share your pain!). But for the most part, there will be drastically diminished froggie posts.

Fortunately for you, I did have a froggie issue today.

I got home from work and was just checking my email when I got a text that read "New Years at my place hope you can make it."

I did not recognize the number at all. I sent a response explaining that phone had been damaged in last weekend's marathon and I lost a bunch of numbers and inquiring who sent this text. (Yes, my phone was damaged, but I don't think I lost any numbers.)

Moments later, I received a return text with a name.

It took a few minutes for me to place it. I had been talking to this guy back in June. That's right JUNE--six months ago. This froggie got my digits, exchanged a few texts and then disappeared. And now he's texting me to go out with him on New Years Eve? WTF?!

I don't even know where this guy lives. Even if I did and wasn't dating someone, why on earth would I think it's a good idea to go to some random dudes house after he disappeared for half the year for a holiday that revolves around drinking? I certainly have no desire to have the roofie special, thank-you-very-much!

Second, why on earth would a guy want to go out with a girl who didn't even remember them until prompted? (And even then, it took me a few minutes to figure it out!)

I have to admit there's a tiny part of me that wants to stir the pot, but I decided not to. I can't decide if this guy is ballsy or just plain stupid. You've really gotta wonder what these frogs are thinking!

Oops!

2009-12-14T18:11:00.003-06:00

I've gotten behind in my blogging. I haven't even kept my training log up to date. I think it's that whole switching classrooms thing.

...maybe my New Years Resolution should be to blog more!

A Fruit Situation

2009-11-08T13:38:00.001-06:00

My school has gone to a Universal Breakfast program where all students are to eat breakfast in the classroom. While there is some personal commentary on what these students are being fed, for the most part I find this is a good idea.

Unfortunately, some of my students are throwing away their food. Things that are packaged or have a thick peel (bananas and oranges) can be "recycled". I'm not sure if this means they're put back in a lunch at a later date, or if they're donated to a food pantry. Any who, partly eaten items or fruits with a soft peel are to be thrown away.

While I understand why they can't reuse fruit with a soft peal, it breaks my heart to see so many pieces of fruit thrown away. I saw, on average, 7-10 pieces of perfectly good fruit thrown away. It completely breaks my heart to see such a waste. I decided that collecting the fruit and eating it myself wasn't the answer. I mean, how much fruit can Danielle and I eat? So, what I will be doing is collecting the fruit and baking the fruit in to something.

Why do you care? Well, it's my blog and I haven't posted in a while (no worries, I have some froggie stories to share too!). And I figured you might be interested in some fruit recipes, or have some recipes for me to use. I'm fairly certain that I'll get sick of the fruit pie rather quickly, so I'm going to get creative and let you know how it works.

My first attempt was your basic apple pie--

I rolled out the pie crust using flour and butter.

Next, I washed, peeled and cut the apples. I mixed about a 1/4 cup of lemon juice to keep the apples from turning brown and to make the pie more tart (I like tart rather than sweet). Next I mixed the apples with a tablespoon-ish of cinnamon (I don't really cook with measuring implements unless it's a new recipe) and about a 1/2 cup of brown sugar. I threw some flour in the mix because I was out of cornstarch to thicken it along with some vanilla and some butter.

Put the mixture in a pie plate between the two layers of pie crust. I used a heart shaped cookie cutter to vent the top layer and then made a design with the left over pieces in the center. I also brushed some egg whites on the top crust to make it shine and brown. Finally, I baked in a 350 degree oven for 35 minutes and I got this lovely pie.

Isn't it pretty?

Not So Fine Dining

2009-08-12T10:28:00.006-05:00

I was at the gym this morning. I really do enjoy going nice and early. There's less people, I don't have to wait for equipment, there's less weirdos...

Oh wait. There's not less weirdos.

I was in the locker room and was going to swim a few laps. I was walking to the pool and sitting on one of the benches is a woman reading a book. I've seen people reading on bikes, ellipticals and treadmills, but never in the locker room. I also noticed that she was also eating a bowl of cereal with milk!!

I'm not saying that I've never eaten while exercising. But cereal and milk? That takes some serious planning. I didn't notice a thermos for the milk. I also didn't see the box of cereal anywhere. Who eats their Lucky Charms in the gym locker room?

Is it just me, or is this really weird?

Always Makes Me Laugh

2009-08-10T10:36:00.000-05:00

Everytime I see this sign, it cracks me up!

TDC09--Lutz Bakery

2009-08-09T11:50:00.001-05:00

Today's long run was hot, humid and awful. The one thing that got me through? I told myself I could stop and get a cupcake. So I finally finished (after bonking and walking the last 2 miles). I stopped at Lutz Bakery. I've driven past it hundreds of times, and never actually gone in; today was the day.

I walked in and ordered a basic vanilla cupcake with pink frosting. They had a limited selection of cupcakes but had many other pastries and cakes. Lutz also had a small cafe area with coffee, but due to the heat the coffee situation wasn't happening.

I ordered my cupcake, and brought it home to eat. This was the absolute worst cupcake, I've ever had in my life. This just might mark the first time I've ever not finished a cupcake. The M&M's had been in the frosting long enough to mar the candy shell. You can even see that in the picture below. The cake itself was very dense and just tasted off and possibly a little stale. The frosting might have been the best thing about the cupcake, and even that wasn't the greatest. It might have only been considered "good" because the rest of it was so bad.
I was worried about heading to this place with out Danielle, but after actually eating a cupcake, she's lucky she wasn't with me. I figured if it was even decent, we'd head back for another go. NO WAY! I'd never order any cake or anything else from this bakery. If you can screw up a cupcake so badly that I can't even finish eating it, I defiantly don't want to try anything else.

Lutz Continental Cafe and Pastry Shop--* 1 Sprinkle (Can I give negative sprinkles?)
2458 W Montrose Ave, Chicago, IL, (773) 478-7785

More Froggy Gifts

2009-07-31T13:00:00.005-05:00

I always look at dates with mild apprehension but in the back of my head, there's always hope. Hope that that day's frog will actually be a prince. Was this the case today? Not so much.

Today's frog, Ozzie* picked me up for our date. While he scored some points for the pick up, he didn't actually get out of the car and ring my doorbell (not that my front doorbell works...but that's not the point). I got in the car, and Ozzie very excitedly asked how my day was (almost too excitedly) and proceeded to tell me that he had a gift for me.

A gift? I'm having toothbrush flashbacks. He reaches behind the seat and gives me something in a black plastic bag. What the crap? This was much bigger than a toothbrush, and clearly much larger, upping the potential for weirdness.

I hesitantly opened the bag and saw a four pack of beer. Beer? On a first date? Do I look like one of your buddies with which you would watch a game? Let me say this again, FLOWERS!! You bring a girl FLOWERS on a first date! Not necessarily roses or anything major. Maybe a tulip might be nice (I like the ones that are multi-colored, if you're wondering). In his defense, it was good beer (Beemish Stout). However, do you really think it's a good idea to give a woman beer on a first date? Is he a creepy weirdo who's just trying to get me wasted to take advantage of me? (Not gonna work with 4 beers, buddy!)

**Sigh** I just don't get it!

*yeah, the names have been changed...Ozzie just seemed fun today.

Check Me Out!

2009-07-21T12:38:00.004-05:00

I'm a "Resident" (too bad they spelled my name wrong)

Check me out here.

TDC09--Sweet Mandy B's or Happy Birthday Danielle

2009-07-12T13:25:00.002-05:00

Tour de Cupcake--July 12, 2009

Today's cupcake is care of Melissa. She brought a dozen to Pauline's for Danielle's Birthday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY, DANIELLE!!!) We had traditional yellow cupcakes with butter creme frosting (yes--that's my favorite kind!)

I personally love Sweet Mandy B's and it's very hard for me to be impartial to this cupcake. The butter creme tastes as if it's made with actual butter (rather than shortening) and the cupcakes are always moist and fluffy. This is quite possibly the best cupcake in Chicago.

While not in this case, I have been to the actual store. It's a cute little store front in Lincoln Park. The parking isn't fabulous, but do-able; especially if you go off peak and/or are just running in for a cupcake. The staff has always been friendly, and in one occasion has given me extra frosting (so tasty!).

They do have other flavors including Red Velvet, Chocolate and a specialty of the day. They have other baked goods as well.

Sweet Mandy B's ***** (5 Sprinkles!!)

1208 W Webster Ave, Chicago, IL 60614 (773) 244-1174

Hungry Frog

2009-07-08T11:30:00.003-05:00

I was heading out for a drink with Ross*, when he decided he was hungry. He asked me if I wanted to stop for a sandwich. Ah Sandwiches. You all know how much I love them. I, of course, said sure.

We stopped, and he ordered a sandwich...but didn't even ask if I wanted one too! This was a second date...and he felt that he could get a sandwich and eat it in front of me!! What the hell?! Yep, he ordered a sandwich, sat down and ate it in front of me.

Shouldn't he at least offered? You take a girl out on a date, you offer to get her a sandwich. Am I so out of it that this is no longer a practice?

*Why I keep changing the names, I'll never know.

TDC09--Molly's Cupcakes

2009-07-04T11:04:00.001-05:00

After the last few weeks of sub-par cupcakes, I was starting to worry that I would be stuck with only one good cupcake place with many other mediocre wannabes. However, after a rainy run, Danielle and I went to Molly's and were pleasantly surprised.

This Lincoln Park bakery is very cute! If it wasn't an old school, the decorations are fantastic. There are even swings for seating at the counter. Besides the aesthetic decorations, there's a sprinkle station for you to further decorate your own cupcake!!

But how do they taste? Well, Danielle and I took forever trying to decide because there were definitely many choices. Molly's didn't just have the traditional cupcake, but also had fun specialty cakes including the Ron Bennington, which is a chocolate cupcake with peanut butter filling. Very rich and very tasty! There were also coconut creme and many others.

Both Danielle and I really enjoyed this place. I loved all the flavors and I really want to go back to try more. Even the traditional vanilla with butter creme cupcake is fantastic! My only beef is the parking situation...but if you're really looking for a tasty treat, I'd double park if I had to!

Molly's Cupcakes--***** 5 Sprinkles!! :)
2536 N. Clark, Chicago Illinois 60614, (773) 883-7220

TDC09--Traveling Cupcakes (Laura's Wedding)

2009-06-28T11:26:00.002-05:00

Well, it seems that you'll miss a long run or two. This week's long run was missed for Laura's Wedding!! It really was beautiful out on the farm with a small pond in the background. Laura looked absolutely beautiful and glowing in her elegant ivory dress. So pretty!

If there's one thing I know about Laura, it's that she loves a good cake as much as I do. Therefore, I knew that her wedding sweets were going to be good. I was NOT disappointed!

Laura had gotten muffin sized chocolate and vanilla cupcakes! They had either red or orange frosting. I thought that this was to match the flowers at her wedding, but Laura said "They were suppose to be white with pretty red and orange flowers but instead they were red and orange frosted with no flowers." Still they were VERY yummy cupcakes! The cupcakes withstood the warm summer day and were perfectly cooked. Even the frosting to cake ratio was perfectly balanced. Not easy to do with cupcakes of that size. I have to confess...I ate more than one. But in my defense, they were so good! Laura ordered them from La Brioche in Madison. It makes me wonder what other tasty treats they have there! I guess next time I'm in Mad-town, I'll have to find out!

La Brioche Bakery ***** 5 Sprinkles!!

2862 University Ave, Madison, WI 53705, (608) 233-3388

TDC09--Southport Grocery & Cafe

2009-06-20T14:12:00.003-05:00

After a long run, Danielle, Melissa and I headed to Southport Grocery & Cafe. Based on the looks of this place (and the location and website) I really had high expectations. It looked like a great brunch spot, but it also had a bakery counter. After waiting and almost excessively long time, not so excessive that we had to leave, but at least 10 minutes (there was no one in line ahead of us, the people working there were just screwing around), I ordered a vanilla cupcake and milk. They guy who took my order was quite rude, asking "Is that all the rest of you are getting too?" (What does it matter?!) The service really was less than hospitable.

We headed out of there for a bench across the street. Again, a disappointing cupcake. The frosting was clearly shortening based (I could taste the shortening, meaning they should have used more butter flavoring). It just wasn't a good cupcake. The cake itself was a little dry. I ate it, but that combined with the attitude and service I wouldn't recommend this place.

Southport Grocery & Cafe-- ** 2 Sprinkles :(
3552 N. Southport • Chicago IL 60657 • 773-665-0100

Tour de Cupcake 2009

2009-06-13T13:50:00.001-05:00

Welcome to the newest feature of my blog...Tour de Cupcake, 2009!

I've wondered, "Where's the best cupcake in Chicago?" Not knowing a definitive answer, I've decided to take it upon myself to find out (it's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it!). After my weekly long run, Danielle and I will be traveling around to bakeries to try their cupcakes. I will be posting reviews for you, dear readers, because you need to know where to get the good ones!

We've developed a rating system. We will be awarding sprinkles to the cupcakes. On a scale of 1 to 5, one being inedible and 5 being awesome. Keep on the look out for the awarding of the 6 sprinkle cupcake; this will be what we deem to be Chicago's Best Cupcake.

So, with out further ado...Let's bring on the Cupcakes!!

Our first stop is Angel Food Bakery. This is a cute little shop near Ashland and Montrose. I really dig the garden (no pun intended) and the Easy Bake Ovens decorating the shop. The cupcakes however, leave a little to be desired. Danielle and I both tried the traditional vanilla cupcake with butter creme frosting. It was so pretty! Very neat looking, great color with candy sprinkles.

However, this wasn't the best cupcake I've ever had. The frosting was clearly shortening based. The cake was actually oily in the center. I know that frosting is designed to keep your cake moist, but this was a little too moist (almost slimy!). It certainly did the job, but I don't see myself jonsing for Angel Food Bakery. I've since been back (only due to proximity), and tried a Red Velvet Cupcake. The cream cheese frosting was ok (just a bit too sour) and the cake it self was dry.

For these inconsistent cupcakes (and their general lack of tastiness), I give Angel Food Cupcakes ** 2 sprinkles. I would like to say that they do have other breakfast items that looked tasty...maybe that's their niche, rather than their cupcakes.

Angel Food Bakery ** (2 Sprinkles)

1636 W Montrose Ave, Chicago, IL (773) 728-1512

Stay Tuned!

2009-06-12T10:53:00.000-05:00

I know, it's been a while! I have some updates and some new features coming... stay tuned!

Not Again!

2009-06-08T21:30:00.002-05:00

I have gotten yet another crack at jury duty. And yes, because it's me I've been selected to be a juror. I'm stuck on this thing until at least next Monday. And while I'm not allowed to discuss the case, I will have a lovely blog detailing any events after the fact.

But for today I'd like to highlight some suggestions in ways the state could make jury duty a little better.

1) Access to a treadmill or other work out equipment. You really expect me to sit still for 8 hours and listen? Damn near impossible. I can watch TV at the gym while I run on the treadmill, why can't I run and listen to the testimony?

2) A COMFORTABLE place to sit. Those chairs suck. How about a lounger, or at least something more ergonomic!

3) Payment above slave wages. I did the math. The $17.20 check broken down to a 7 hour day (not getting paid for lunch hour) is $2.45 an hour. Total crap. Isn't there a national minimum wage?

4) Hours comparable to my regular work day. Teachers generally don't have to stay at work until 5:00pm. Granted, I'm probably going to get some scorn from those who don't have the same hours, but I'll remind you that teachers do more work in their off hours than in other professions.

5) Knowing that for every day that you actually have to sit on a jury, you get 2 years where you won't be summoned. So, in this case, I'll be on a jury until at least next Monday. With this equation, I wouldn't have to be called again for 12 years. And if this equation was true, I wouldn't be in this situation now...I'd still have time from the last time I served. That seems much more fair to me since I can think of tons of people I know that have never been called.

6) Raffle off prizes. I'm sure business could donate, sports tickets, spa treatments, gift certificates, ect. If I knew there was a chance to win me some Bears tickets...I think I'd be serving a little more cheerfully.

I'm sure over the course of the next week, I'll be coming up with more helpful suggestions, until then I will be sitting in the jury box.

Urping Froggies

2009-06-04T11:19:00.003-05:00

I was having drinks with Eric* when all of a sudden he got up and excused himself from the bar. It was kind of weird, but ya know...sometimes things happen. He came back and said he wasn't feeling very well. I told him that if he needed to go, that was ok. But he sat back down and continued to talk.

Not even a beer had gone by, and he got up again. He came back saying that he thought he had the stomach flu (EW!) and that he needed to go. It better be the stomach flu, because the thought that I make men vomit doesn't make me happy.

We left the bar and he put out his arms for a hug. Now, generally, I'm a hugger. However, I just met this guy and clearly he was ill. I do understand that when you're not feeling well, a hug is nice. So I compromised. I did the "pat, no body contact" kinda hug.

And then it happened. He leaned in for a kiss. UGH!! Seriously!! YOU WERE THROWING UP!! NO KISSY-KISSY!! That's just nasty! And then, he acted all offended when I didn't want to kiss him. HELLO!!! I don't want your puke-tastic germs! What is this guy thinking?

**blah, blah, blah--yeah I changed the name!

A Spring Time Poem

2009-05-29T10:59:00.001-05:00

Spring has sprung.
Summer's almost here.
The kids are squirrelly as hell--
won't someone please get me a beer?

Follow Me

2009-05-28T21:06:00.001-05:00

Follow me on twitter!

A New Addiction

2009-05-26T11:00:00.001-05:00

I've discovered this site called sporcle.com. It's kind of awesome. It's a trivia site where it asks you to create lists of things that you know. It's got so many random things from naming the fifty states (got 'em!) to listing all the Chicago Bears quarterbacks since 1986 (missed 2).

So much fun, but I warn you, HIGHLY addictive! Have fun!

Fashionista Froggies

2009-05-20T21:35:00.004-05:00

After work today, I headed to Piper's Alley to pick up a race packet for the Soldier Field 10 Mile. As I was getting the bibs, this guy starts talking to me. We followed along through the packet pick up and I made friendly conversation, not thinking anything of it.

While I was there, I needed pick up some Body Glide (those bastards who stole my stuff also stole my body glide...so weird, I know!) And that guy follows and continuing to talk to me. After I paid, he asked if I wanted to get a cup of coffee (Starbucks is on the corner). I thought, why not--who doesn't like impromptu coffee with a reasonably attractive guy who likes to run?

We got our coffee and as we were chatting, he suddenly stops and said to me "You know, you're really cute..." Now what girl doesn't like to hear that? I really think more people should tell me how cute I am. However, he didn't just stop there (as he probably should have), continuing with "But you'd be a total knock out if you'd just put on some make-up. And a dress, or something tighter and low cut..."

What the hell?! How did this digress so quickly? I wasn't even half way done with my coffee. I was so shocked as I sat there listening to him critique my lack of style (in his opinion). At this point I wasn't sure if he was hitting on me or a gay man looking for a project. Granted, I'm no mascara-happy-make-up-queen, but I'm better than a stick in the eye. Furthermore, I went to Fleet Feet from work. Can anyone explain to me how it would be appropriate for me to wear make up like a drag queen and slutty clothes to a school?! (In saying that, I'm making no judgements on any of our parents.)

Once I gained my composure, I stopped him and said "Um, I gotta go feed my meter! Would you excuse me? I'll be right back!"

Dear Readers, I have a confession to make: I found a spot on LaSalle with out a meter. I just left and didn't come back (I kinda wonder how long he sat there). Oh, and I also took the quarters he offered me... Oops! But in my defense, I had to listen to that crap and I paid for my own coffee.

This post is brought to you by Isabelle

2009-05-20T20:43:00.000-05:00

As a runner, I understand it's important to have an ample amount of protein in my diet. It aids in muscle repair and recovery. Also as a vegetarian, I sometimes feel the need to supplement my diet with protein shakes.

For these reasons, enlisted the help of Julia who works for Abbott and also owns EAS. I love these shakes, and in the scope of protein shakes these probably taste the best. Because she works for Abbott, she gets a discount on all of their products and I asked if I could take advantage of her employee discount. She was ordering for herself and her husband anyway, so it really wasn't a problem. (I bring it up, because her husband didn't want the Myoplex Lite, he wanted the powder shakes--resulting in a gi-normous jug that contained 8LBS OF PRODUCT!!!--I thought it was funny.)

Any who, I met Julia for our weekly run and she had the shakes for me. As she was handing me the box she looked down and saw that something had been added to the packaging...
That would be her daughter's school picture stuck to my boxes of protein shake. We were laughing so hard! Clearly, Isabelle is endorsing the EAS Myoplex Lite. What were her thought processes as she walked passed these protein shakes? Did she say to herself "Hey, I've got these stickers of me...they should go...HERE!!" Ah, sometimes I wonder what kids are thinking.

DONE!!

2009-05-19T21:29:00.000-05:00

On Monday, I took my National Board Exam!! (It sucked--that's all I have to say about that.) And I'm done!! I won't know the results until November, but until then, it's time to play!
WOO!

Because the Milkshake Wasn't Bad Enough!

2009-05-12T22:17:00.000-05:00

I went to the gym for a killer work out. I ran, biked, worked out with Hector and swam. I was walking back to my locker feeling pretty good about myself, and that's when the problems started.

I turned the corner and saw my stuff strewn about. In the less than 20 minutes I was at the pool someone had broken in to my locker (with a lock on it) and stolen my stuff!! My Blackberry, wallet, planner, keys and, to add insult to injury, MY CLOTHES!!! They stole my work clothes and my sweaty gym clothes!! Including my shoes (with about 300 miles on them) and underwear!! All that was left was my bag and a few smaller items. Even the lock was gone!!

If that wasn't bad enough, I gathered what's left of my things and had to walk out to the front desk in a bikini that's a size too big and about 5 years old and a towel to go and ask for help. On my list of mortifying things, "public nakedness" is up there. I was at the front desk, obviously upset, and they asked what was taken and then offered to help me look for my stuff. One of the girls asked "Why don't you get dressed and we'll help you look for your stuff." I was very upset at this point and may have yelled "I can't because THEY STOLE MY CLOTHES!!" Really, because I make it a point to hang out at the gym front desk at 6:45 pm (a peak time) practically naked.

Several of the girls and one of the managers went to the locker room and searched it for me, not finding any thing. One of the girls asked what size clothes I wore and picked out an outfit for me at the pro-shop. I felt so pitiful saying "I'm sorry, I can't pay for these." She told me not to worry about it. Thank God, because I was so uncomfortable!! I put on the clothes (and bless her heart) it was a perfect fit. Unfortunately, (and I hate to sound ungrateful) the girl picked out a white t-shirt. The problem, was the wet swim top underneath (Hello! Wet t-shirt contest!) How I didn't end up with a date out of this, I'll never know. I was upset, and everyone at the gym was looking at me (or so it felt). It really was the perfect storm of embarrassment.

After I was dressed, they let me sit at the front desk and call to cancel my credit and debit cards until the police came. I also called Jack to come and get me and to tow my car home. The police filed a report for me, they asked me where my shoes were and I was stifling back tears when I said "They were stolen." The officer was really nice and not only gave me his number in case anything happened but also sent a police car to sit outside my house to make sure I was safe and no one was trying to get in (extra nice!). Jack took me to Verizon to activate an old phone and called a locksmith for me and stayed with me until my locks were changed.

It's a huge nightmare as I work on getting EVERYTHING replaced. What's the topping to this fan-frickin'-tastic day? Oh, I had a summons for jury duty sitting in my mail box. Yeah, it was an AWESOME day.

Textually Active

2009-05-01T18:00:00.004-05:00

I was surfing about and found this site that completely cracked me up. The site is called Texts From Last Night and the tag line is "Remember that text you shouldn't have sent last night? We do!"

It's a list of texts with the only denotation being the area code of the sender. It's hilarious!! I know that I for one should not be allowed near any electronic device when I've had a few beverages, and could see things that I have texted being posted here. After reading some of the postings, I was almost crying! The fact that they're taken out of context makes them just a bit more funny! Check it out--total time waster, but to damn funny to miss!

The Insanity Continues...

2009-04-23T09:48:00.005-05:00

Nine days until the Wisconsin Marathon. Why is that insane? Because in 3 days I'll be running the Country Music Marathon in Nashville. :)

Julia sent the motivational pre-race email and said "Have an Awesome Marathon - Remember you have...." Between that and the Awesome Sauce, I'm golden! :)

Monkeys and Frogs

2009-04-08T08:42:00.005-05:00

The things I find while procrastinating...
This one's about as catchy as the "Llama Song"...

And while this is entertaining, I think most of my Frog Chronicles could beat this next one. (Who wants to help me make a video? We could road trip to the Hinsdale Oasis!)

Mixed Tape

2009-04-06T13:53:00.002-05:00

I was at the gym this morning. After my work out, I took a shower and was blow drying my hair. I glanced down the counter and someone had left a mixed tape. It's still 2009, right? I could see a rogue CD, but a tape? It's really weird. Does anyone still have a tape deck?

The best part of all this...it was labeled "The Bitch'n Mix".

**sigh**I only wish I knew what songs were actually on it.

Spring Break?

2009-04-06T08:13:00.002-05:00

Facts:

It's April.
I'm on Spring Break.
It's snowing, blustry and all around crappy out.

What the hell?!

My Milkshake Brings All the Boys to the Yard...

2009-04-02T10:14:00.016-05:00

I was in Greek Town, getting Melissa some dinner from Mr. Greek. She had been sick (and still is) and I offered to pick her up some dinner. I wasn't really hungry, so I just ordered a milkshake and some fruit for myself. They put the two drinks (my milkshake and Melissa's Diet Pepsi) in a drink carrier.

As I was walking to the car, this homeless guy (who had asked me for change as I walked into Mr. Greek), ran up and snatched my milkshake from the carrier and took off!

I stood there, on Jackson Ave. looking bewildered thinking "Seriously?! Was I just mugged for a milkshake?! Really? Am being punked?"

He clearly wasn't even going for my purse. It was on the other side of me, securely under my arm. This guy was going for the food. I couldn't believe it! And it's not like I was going to chase him down. I mean, he's homeless. He probably needed it more than I did. Besides, could you imagine explaining that one to the police:

"Ma'am, Why were you beating this man?"
"Because he stole my milkshake."
"You're beating a homeless guy over a milkshake?"

See my point? And I don't think "Well, it was chocolate!" would be considered a valid defense.

It's too crazy! If he had asked for it, I would have just given it to him. Fortunately, I wasn't hurt (aside for spilling a little Diet Pepsi on my arm), and my purse wasn't taken. So, once I got over the fact that I was with out a milkshake (just fruit isn't the same), I thought the whole thing was pretty funny.

DONE!

2009-03-27T16:25:00.006-05:00

Finally...the bane of my existence for the last several months...Completed, packed and mailed. I can't remember the last time I was so happy to ship something!! That little blue box contains my National Boards Portfolio; it's part of the process to become a National Board Certified teacher. It's taken up waaaaay too much time and the reason I've had almost no life (and the reason I haven't been bogging much!).

Here's Laura at FedEx, shipping her portfolio... And I am just as happy to see mine go, too! Next up, the comprehensive exam in May....followed by waiting until November to hear the results...no worries, dear readers, I'm sure you'll hear the news when I do! :)

Picky Eater

2009-03-26T10:50:00.002-05:00

Last weekend, I made some tuna salad. Generally, I make enough for two sandwiches. I like lots of stuff in my tuna salad, so I add things like celery, spicy mustard, chives, ranch dressing, kale, hard boiled eggs... a lot of it is what is in the fridge, but I do like more than just tuna and mayo.

I had made the first sandwich and had gone out on my back deck to eat it (it was such a pretty day!). I didn't make both at the same time, because I like my bread toasted and I didn't want it to get soggy while I was eating my first sandwich.

Well, it was a tasty sandwich, and I went back inside to make the second. I walked in to the kitchen and there was Tubby McFatty (aka Seamus the Wondercat) up on the counter eating out of the bowl of tuna! After shooing him from my lunch I noticed he had clearly been up there a while. Not only did he make a dent in the tuna, but it was obvious that he did not like the hard boiled eggs that I had added to the mix. In fact, there was a tiny pile of egg bits next to the bowl! He had picked out the egg bits and left them on the side in one little pile. I really should have taken a picture, because if I didn't see it, I wouldn't have believe it myself.

Picky little brat! I guess everyone likes their tuna a certain way.

Signs of Spring

2009-03-21T22:19:00.001-05:00

For some it's the groundhog being ripped from his cozy little hole, or the official call for pitchers and catchers to report, some say it's the first robin with it's red breast chirping away. While all are excellent measures of Spring coming, for me it's something a little different. I had seen traces of him for a few weeks, but no confirmed sightings. But on my run today, there he was:

I saw the Hi Guy on the Lakefront Path.

OH YEAH!! Happy Spring!

My New Camping Buddy

2009-03-06T17:34:00.006-06:00

I recently found an excellent deal on a new tent at Sports Authority that I just couldn't pass up. I set up the tent (in my living room) to make sure everything was ok.The only problem with the tent was that the directions for setting it up had been torn off the storage bag. The were still in the box, but not attached. For what I paid, it's still worth it.

While the tent was set up, look who decided that he likes camping... Yep, Seamus the Wondercat, checkin' out the tentAnd as I was writing this blog (sitting in my tent, of course), someone decided that they wanted to show me what he thought should be considered as 'camping supplies.'So, who wants to go camping? :)

Box of Joy--Day 14

2009-03-06T10:49:00.002-06:00

I was having a tough day yesterday...I just kept thinking about Grandpa. This was just what I needed...even if it did make me cry. (Don't worry, it was a good cry.)

Thank you, Julia. You're awesome!

Box of Joy--Day 13

2009-03-04T20:05:00.005-06:00

Dude!! When I actually have second to work on this, I'll post a picture of the completed puzzle. :)

Box of Joy--Day 12

2009-03-03T10:22:00.004-06:00

Awesome!

To Grandpa--Memories

2009-03-02T12:07:00.010-06:00

My Grandfather passed away this morning.

I hope you'll all indulge me as I share some memories and stories:

I know that "Mr. Fairbrother" will be remembered in the neighborhood as the man who used to walk the dogs (Great Danes) by shutting the dog's leash in the car door, and driving slowly down the street, having the dog trot along beside. He used to simply hook the loop of the leash over the side view mirror until one of the dogs decided that he was done walking and just sat down in the street, ripping the mirror from the car.

I am proud that he gave service to our country during World War II in the United States Marine Corps. I will always appreciate that he told me his stories about the war and Iwo Jima. While he was always reminiscent, he didn't looked back with rose colored glasses. Never softening the war stories for a little girl, because "War is hell, honey."

Saying "I'm Bored!!" and then having Grandpa hand me the book The History of the United States Marine Corps. He had me read it, and then we discussed it. I really thought it was punishment at the time, but I learned a lot. And hearing Grandpa's tales woven in with the book really made things much more memorable. I'm really glad that I was "bored."

The Fez and the Sparkly Fez.

Grandpa's goofy goat named Efram. He just had to have it, because it had little gold balls. (Yeah, I do mean gold goat testicles.)

"If you've got it, flaunt it."

I'll never forget when Grandpa took me to the shooting range. I knew nothing about guns and was pretty scared of them. I remember wearing shorts and a white eyelet shirt to the firing range and all the old men were laughing. He taught me to load his .22, 9mm, and 45. He had me try all three. The old men stopped laughing after they realized I was an excellent shot, having a tight cluster on all my targets. I remember Grandpa saying, "Of course she's a great shot, she's my Granddaughter!"

The gold anchor, the big gold anchor and the really big gold anchor.

Shopping for his watch.

I remember Grandma and Grandpa coming up for my high school graduation. Grandpa was wearing his hot pink sport coat. I remember being on stage, and Marcella (the girl sitting next to me) leaned over and said "Check out that old dude in the hot pink jacket!!" To which I replied "Yep, that's my Grandpa!" He had quite a flair for dressing. It wasn't just the hot pink coat...but also hot pink pants...and bright red pants...and purple pants... (you get the point).

Making "Goombay Smash".

Learning the "correct way" to pour a scotch.

Grandpa taking me out for a drive in his new convertible. He let me drive it. I was going down A1A, driving the speed limit, when he told me, "Honey, if you're not doing at least 25 over, you're not doing it right." (Now you know where I get my lead foot!)

So for Grandpa, I'll be ordering a drink...and you know it will be a "Two Fingers, Johnny Walker, Black Label on the rocks--easy on the rocks."

Box of Joy--Day 11

2009-03-02T10:27:00.002-06:00

Box of Joy--Day 10

2009-03-01T23:27:00.006-06:00

Yeah, I kinda do go through a lot of lip balm... :) And this is the one with SPF 15--no lip cancer for me!

Box of Joy--Day 9

2009-02-28T13:22:00.000-06:00

All I have to say is "Woo-Hoo!"

Box of Joy--Day 8

2009-02-27T09:49:00.003-06:00

Sushi Party at Bethie's!! (After my boards are done and I learn how to make sushi.)

Making a Point

2009-02-26T21:55:00.000-06:00

Most of you know that my world has been work, gym, boards and repeat. For the certification process, I need to video tape a few lessons in my classroom. I did a project requiring my 5th graders to compare works of art and explain why they are similar and then present this to their classmates. The children understood why I was taping and were excited and proud to be the examples for me to submit.

A pair of boys walked up to the front of the classroom to give their presentation. One of the boys whips out a broken off radio antenna, opens it up and begins to use it as a pointer! I asked the student "Did you just happen to have that in your pocket?"

He responded with the tone of DUH, "No. He did." and gesturing to his partner. He continued using the pointer through out his presentation using the broken antenna to point out how the art works were similar. I was dying!! It was so hilarious!

And the best part...it's all on video.

Box of Joy--Day 7

2009-02-26T11:22:00.005-06:00

At first I thought this was a punching bag...but they're actually "Funsational", sunshine, happy balloons! (Yep, when I realized what they were, I did the high pitched squeak of "SUNSHINE BALLOONS!")

Not again!

2009-02-25T18:24:00.004-06:00

Yesterday positively sucked. Fortunately, I didn't check my mail because the insult to injury would have been the fact that there was a jury summons waiting for me.

Ugh. I just know I'm going to get picked again...damn my innocent aura and wholesome face!

Box of Joy--Day 6

2009-02-25T08:52:00.004-06:00

AWESOME!! I'm wondering if a bartender would accept this coupon when we go out...

Box of Joy--Day 5

2009-02-24T23:47:00.002-06:00

Mmmm...sushi. The perfect blend of carbs and protein for a pre-race dinner. Who says you need pasta? I'm also excited that the set is dishwasher safe...I know. Sometimes, I'm weird like that.

Thanks, Super Julia (and Tina and JoAn) for cheering me up after my craptastic day. Cake and facials DO make things better!

Sticky Situation

2009-02-24T09:34:00.010-06:00

Today, I have my 8th graders, who are making African Masks. It's a fun paper mache project. I usually make the paper mache at home because it's cheaper to use flour and water and make it on the stove than to buy the paste. I had a big plastic container filled with warm paper mache sitting on the passenger seat as I drove to work.

When I got to work, I reached for the paper mache and got a handful of warm stickiness. The lid had popped off of the container and gotten all over my leather seats. I was thinking it wasn't that bad...I could just wipe it up. I went in the school to get some paper towels so that I could clean it.

As I was wiping up the spill, I picked up the container...what originally looked like a few ounces turned out to be almost half the container. My binder for my boards, that the paper mache was sitting upon is completely stuck together. Awesome. I wonder if I can send it in and get credit for it as an art project?

Then I slid the seat forward. Thank God for floor mats because there was a layer of of paper mache under the seats several inches thick. I dumped it off in the parking lot, leaving what looked like a pile of puke. After I scrubbed the remaining puddles, I carried in the floor mat (also looking like a vomitious mess). Glen, our engineer, used the water shower for cleaning and sprayed it down for me.

I think I got most of the mess...at least I hope I did. I really don't want to head out to the car later and have it smell like rancid paper mache. I currently am working on drying my binder for the boards, and cleaning the paper mache from my shoes, clothes and hair. Ugh! What a fantastic way to start the day. :(

Does anyone know of a place that does a good job of cleaning car upholstery?

Box of Joy--Day 4

2009-02-23T08:41:00.004-06:00

Wait, it doesn't make me run faster?! I guess Mary Kay has to work on reformulating their product!

Box of Joy--Day 3

2009-02-22T21:29:00.006-06:00

Monkey playing cards?! (And yes, when they were unwrapped that was said with a high pitched squeak.) This will add a whole new dimension to playing solitaire! You should see the Jokers…they’re so freakin’ cute!

Box of Joy--Day 2

2009-02-21T19:20:00.008-06:00

So perfect after my very cold run today!

A Mysterious Package

2009-02-20T23:10:00.006-06:00

Today, when I got home I found a package between my doors. I thought to myself "That's odd. I left after 6:30 pm, and that's awfully late for the UPS guy to stop by."

I looked at the brown paper wrapped package and saw "To: Super Bethie From: Super Julia"

How exciting!! I love packages! (more than I love sandwiches--and you know how much I love a good sandwich, but I digress.) I'm very blessed to say Super Juila is my very own, personal Superhero. If you haven't your own Superhero, you really ought to find one. Anywho, I carefully tore open the brown paper and found this...

I opened the note and found that Super Julia had left me a "Box of Joy". I've never had any one leave me a Box of Joy before! According to the instructions I am to:

1) Receive Joy Box (whew! I got the first one right with out even trying!)

2) Open Box and read instructions (Two for two! Woo-hoo!)

3) The day after receiving the Joy box, open one gift a day in the order they are numbered.

I think the hardest part is being patient, but I will survive. Fortunately, tomorrow isn't very far away! I'll keep you updated as to the contents of the Box of Joy. Looks like I'll have something to post about for the next two weeks (maybe that was all part of the Super Julia's plan...she was tired of my lack of blogging due to me working on my Boards!).

Thank you, Super Julia!

On the Road Again

2009-02-18T22:49:00.006-06:00

It's that time of year again...the annual Chicago Auto Show!! Ah, how I do love horsepower! Although due to current economic trends, the hp-palooza was definitely down played and fuel efficiency was all the rage. To be honest, I was looking at the SUV's to better accommodate my triathloning, Chicago snow, and comparing them for mpg (BTW--I'm really liking the Ford Escape!).

But in true Auto Show form I HAD to see my favorites...The 2009 Mustang, in a beautiful cheery red. (I seem to have forgotten why I need a bigger car that won't get stuck in the snow...)
Followed by the 2010 Shelby, with 315 hp...(Yeah, I think I may have started talking dirty to her.)
And I do, of course, prefer my babies American made (I'm my Grandpa's girl on this one!) and headed over to Chevy to see the Stingray concept. She looks like the Batmobile!! I love her!

And finally, my celebrity sighting of the Auto show this year...one of the Autobots from Transformers: It's Bumble Bee!! It may not be Optimus Prime, but still one of my favorites (that and Jazz). I'd say it was a fun time at the auto show!

There's such a thing as too much sugar.

2009-02-11T16:05:00.005-06:00

Today seemed to be a crazy day. The students are heading into a five day weekend (due to Lincoln's Birthday, Professional Development day and President's Day) and to add to it they were extra squirrelly due to the excess sugar of all of their Valentines.

For example, one of my 4th graders seemed to have escaped from his substitute teacher. I was standing in front of the classroom teaching the rest of his class. I glanced over to see the student through the window. He was standing there with a pencil shoved up his nose, licking the window.

This is why I am a proponent of the aerial spraying of Ritalin. Thank God we have a long weekend.

Who Took My Cheese?

2009-02-02T21:23:00.003-06:00

I came home from a very long day, and decided on some comfort food for dinner. I opened a box of Mac & Cheese to find... NO CHEESE!!!

What the crap!? I mean, it's half the product!! And let's face it, the cheese is the best part of the whole thing. While I could easily make due, it's not the point...I want my cheese!

Why I Should Not be Left to My Own Devices

2009-01-30T12:39:00.007-06:00

I've been home sick the last two days with a wicked sinus infection. In fact, yesterday, I was awake long enough to call in sick, go to the doctor, get a prescription from Walgreen's, watch our Governor get ousted and, of course, Gray's Anatomy (Yes, there was much napping between these events).

I still feel pretty crappy today, even if I've only been awake for an hour or so. And I'd like to share with you some reasons why I should not be left to my own devices. I decided to eat something (marshmallow's and grapefruit--yesterday I had leftovers; pasta and chocolate), shower (it's been a few days) and use the Neti pot.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the Neti pot, it's a plastic pot that looks kinda like Aladdin's lamp. You're supposed to mix a diluted saline solution and use it to rinse your sinuses. I often forget to actually use it until it's too late, I found that while it's really weird the first couple of times using it, it really does work.

Any who, I figured since I have a horrible sinus infection, now would be an excellent time to use it. But as I was looking for the saline (ie SALT) packets in the medicine cabinet, I came across a bottle of hydrogen peroxide. I was thinking, "Hey--this is good for wound care! If I rinse with this, it will help my sinus infection!"

So...I poured some in to the pot, with the saline packet and mixed the two. I did not add water as you're supposed to, per the mixing directions of the packet. I warmed the solution, tilted my head over the sink to use it and...

HOLY CRAP!!! It was like I snorted Pop Rocks and a carbonated beverage up my nose! I was completely unprepared for the mayhem that ensued. I was snotting and fizzing all over the bathroom, flailing about like a sprinkler. OH, SWEET MOTHER OF GOD!!! I thought for a second that an alien was going to burst out of my face!!! I couldn't even see straight until all the bubbling subsided.

Not only was the peroxide clearly working on any infected areas in my sinuses, but it was also being gently rinsed after with salt! I have to say it did clear out the one side that I was able to use it on...but next time IF I decide to try it again, I'm thinking DILUTE the peroxide first.

Please learn from my mistake. Don't put hydrogen peroxide and salt up your nose when you have a sinus infection. It's just not a good idea. I really should not be left to my own devices...clearly, I'm just trouble.

If I were a cereal...

2009-01-23T13:29:00.005-06:00

I was grocery shopping with Melissa the other day. She became very excited in the cereal isle and told me that she had found the type of cereal I would be (if I came in cereal form):That's right, I'd be Perky O's!! (I'm just happy she didn't say Frosted Flakes!)

That time of year...

2009-01-15T11:08:00.010-06:00

That's right, it's that time of year when the gym is flooded with all those fakers, who made New Years Resolutions to get back in to shape, crowding my gym and taking up my machines. Now I have no problem with people at the gym. But I do have a problem with the fact that this should be a lifestyle, not something of convenience. If these people truly wanted to be in shape, I'd see them in July too!

But I digress. Along with the hordes of out of shape couch potato's comes with a whole host of people who just don't know how to behave at they gym. I swear, it's ridiculous!! In the past 2 weeks, I've witnessed more than necessary, including:

The naked people are back. Yep, the ones who think it's cool to lounge about the locker room naked or scarcely clothed talking on their cell phones or just generally prancing about. And trust me, they're not the people any one wants to see naked.
The people who don't know how to work the treadmills. Ok, these people really don't annoy me. When they fall off, it's kinda funny. (I can laugh, it's happened to me!)
The people who are lost. My trainer was stretching me out near the large windows over looking the pool. Some guy came over and asked him where the pool was!! He pointed behind him to the large body of water. Then the guy asked, "How do I get in?" Hector pointed to the door (just a few feet away) and also mentioned that there was a door through the locker room.
People who talk loudly on their cell phones while they are using the machines. If you're going that slowly on the machine, you need to get off the phone and amp it up!! Also, I don't care about the gossip in your world (really? you slept with this heinous guy last night?!), nor do I think you should give mileage reports from your treadmill while you are walking.
Couples who make out. I was on the stair stepper and this couple got off the machines in front of me and proceeded to make out. I saw tongue...and much more than I wanted to see. To make things worse, they wouldn't stop! I had to get off the stair machine, it was that bad.
Excessive cologne. I shouldn't smell you for 5 minutes after you've walked by.
The people who just hang out near machines. They're not actually doing anything. I think they just go to the gym to say that they've gone to the gym that day.
On a similar note there's the people who stare. They just stare at you while you're on a machine or working out. I don't get it. It's just creepy!
Those who turn the gym into a meat market. I go to the gym to work out. Not to socialize, not to pick up men. TO WORK OUT. I don't want some guy to be 'hanging out' just to hit on me when I get off the treadmill.
Creepy, hair guys in the whirlpool. I hate that they're sitting there gawking when I swim laps. No, I don't need you to count for me, and no, I didn't turn my head while swimming to talk to you. It's called breathing. I guess maybe, in this case, drowning would have been the better option.

Can you tell I'm annoyed? I wouldn't mind the extra crowd if I didn't have to put up with these offenses. I've been heading to the gym before work, just to avoid the people and the problems. I can't wait until these people give up and go back to their couches.

Caffinated Froggy

2009-01-10T21:18:00.007-06:00

I was freezing this morning after my run on the Lakefront Path (unless you're living under a rock, you know there's been crazy snow in Chicago!) I was heading down Montrose and as I was shivering I saw a Starbucks and I thought "Ooo! Coffee!!" (So profound, I know.)

I got in line and was bouncing a little because I was quite chilled. This guy in line turns to me and asked if I was ok. I responded by saying "I'm cold, and just need something to warm up."

He replies with a leer and says, "How about a hot beef injection?"

I can't imagine the look on my face...what the hell?! Clearly, my brain was also frozen, because in hindsight, I can come up with at least half a dozen biting responses. All I could do was just walk out...sans coffee.

What is he thinking?! Does he really think that I'm gonna say "Ya know, that sounds amazing! Yeah, let's do it!"? Or that I would find his obscene comment funny or charming? Who even says that or feels the need to make such a comment like that in a Starbucks at 10:30 in the morning?!

UGH!

Escape!

2008-12-22T18:43:00.004-06:00

This week, I'm down in Florida visiting my parents for Christmas (Please stop cursing me. I do, in fact, know how cold it is in Chicago right now!) We went out to dinner tonight and took one of the dogs with us. For those of you who don't know, my mother is a Canine Companions for Independence (CCI) Puppy Raiser and Mentor. She trains puppies for persons who are wheelchair bound.

On this particular evening we took Yana with us. She was supposed to be under the table while we were eating. As I was dining on my salad, I looked down and realized, Yana was gone!!

CRAP!! THERE'S A CCI PUPPY LOOSE IN OUTBACK STEAKHOUSE!!

I looked behind the booth-- no dog. I panicked and had to find her, so I began crawling through the restaurant looking for the dog, whispering her name. I didn't want to alert the other customers (I mean, maybe they wouldn't notice a random woman crawling on the floor.) I found her under the bench of a booth two tables away scrounging for crumbs.

This unfortunately is where the people at the booth noticed me crawling on the floor. I quickly apologized (still on all fours) and told them that I had lost my dog. The woman asked if it was a toy dog. I replied, "No, it's a service dog." (Isn't that obvious?!!? Why else would I be crawling about in a restaurant?)

I called for Yana and she scooted out from under the woman's legs. The woman looked so bewildered to have a dog come from below her seat. I quickly apologized and crawled back to my booth with the dog in tow to find both of my parents laughing hysterically at the whole scene.

Well, at least someone found the puppy!

I have come to believe...

2008-12-12T16:54:00.007-06:00

...the DMV is clearly purgatory. There are some angels that make life a little easier...and Satin's spawn that make me want to become a danger to myself and others.

...there is a cold war between Illinois and Wisconsin. I like to call the state line "The Cheddar Curtain". I don't think the war will end in my life time.

...irregardless of how hard I try, some people are just going to be assholes.

...no one is inherently evil. Sometimes people seem that way as a result of their environment.

...it doesn't matter how bad I think my day has gone, it really could always be worse.

...I should never under estimate the amount of stupidity of people in large numbers.

...if I ask for an angel, one will appear. It's up to me to realize that they are present.

...everyone likes good, old fashioned, 'snail mail', especially when it's a letter or card from a friend.

...I can't control everything (people/situations), only how I react.

...character is what people do when they think that no one is watching them.

...even when I'm in the foulest moods, there are always rays of sunshine sparkling like a gift. Sometimes, I'm that sunshine for someone else.

...sometimes things are going to be painful. It's my choice as to the amount I will suffer.

It just takes a minute...

2008-12-09T12:27:00.003-06:00

I know it's been a while since I've blogged (sorry, Elaine!!). I've just been a busy girl!! I know that I have some posting to do on both of my blogs! I just wanted to take the time to post some info for a cause near and dear to me.

Most of you know that there is a special place in my heart for those serving in our country's military. Having been the daughter of a man who served in the Navy during Vietnam, and the granddaughter of one who was a Marine in WWII, I learned at an early age to respect the gift I've been given at the cost of those who have served. I came to appreciate this much more when I traveled overseas.

I've always believed that even if you don't agree with the reasons that our troops have been deployed it is still our responsibility to support them (I mean, do you really think someone wants to be sent thousands of miles way to a giant sandbox away from their families and friends?!?) I realize these men and women, are just doing their jobs. If one doesn't agree with the allocation of troops and funding it's our responsibility to elect those who will ensure their care.

Anywho, off my soap box and on to my point. While there are many sites that offer ways to send care packages to soldiers (anysoldier.com, Soldier's Angel's, The Hugs Project, ect...) here's a even simpler (and cheaper) way to show a soldier you care. Let'sSayThanks.com donates cards to send to troops that are overseas. It's as simple as a few clicks of the mouse. Second, Walter Reed, VA accepts general cards to recovering soldiers. I know that I always have a few extra holiday cards from the boxes, and maybe you do too! Just send it off to the hospital, and send some cheer to someone. Here's the address:

A Recovering American Soldier
c/o Walter Reed Army Medical Center
6900 Georgia Avenue,NW
Washington,D.C. 20307-5001

I hope that you all can find time to spread some cheer. It only takes a minute!!

(Thanks to Petra for the link and Mom for the info!)

Here Comes the Sun

2008-12-03T15:16:00.005-06:00

This past weekend was clearly a bomb. I'm sure you've read the previous posts, but I will add that my wallet was also stolen. That's right; no cash, no ID, no credit cards. NADA.

I called and cancelled everything. So far, I have a new Driver's Licence and State ID as well as my debit card. I'm about to go postal on UPS because according to my tracking number, my cards were delivered yesterday. I haven't seen them yet. This blows!!

I also finally made it to the doctor. A bout of steroids and antibiotics later, I'm hoping I'll start feeling better. I'm still questioning the 1/2 marathon this weekend. We'll see if it's walker friendly. If nothing else, I'll still be there to cheer on Amy.

So why the sun? Well, first of all, I am going to the Sunshine State tomorrow! I also went to the CARA Volunteer event where I got my new running jacket! It's even got built in gloves! If that wasn't exciting enough, I won the raffle!! I've never won a big prize like that!! What did I win? Oh, round trip airfare to anywhere Jet Blue Flies! Oh-yeah!

Were you aware that Jet Blue flew to the Caribbean? Here comes the sun!

To all my caffeine junkie friends...

2008-11-30T08:01:00.004-06:00

Check it out!

(ps. If someone can tell me why I can't copy and paste to have the entire video shown here, please let me know. I can only copy a snippet of the code--thanks!)

For those of you who went to H.S. with me...

2008-11-27T09:36:00.003-06:00

Hank Dombrowski passed away yesterday morning. I found the story here. My thoughts and prayers are with the family. If anyone hears any information about the arrangements, please let me know.

HD--Huh?

2008-11-25T18:44:00.002-06:00

I finally got the coupon in the mail for my digital converter box and went out and purchased the box (thanks, Ben for the feedback!). I'm not very electronical about setting things up. I just don't get it. I tried to set it up today. And by "set it up", I mean I kept plugging and unplugging things until I could make it work. So far, not so smooth:

1. Why does it keep skipping and getting all pixelated? That's really annoying. If I wanted my TV watching experience to resemble a really poorly dubbed Japanese movie, I'd rent Godzilla.

2. How do I make it work through the TV instead of as a component like the DVD player? My TV does cool things like Picture in a Picture. What's the big deal about this? I can watch 2 football games at once! Or, in the fall, the Cubs and Bears at the same time!! I'd really like this one fixed!

3. Where did CBS go? How do I get CBS so I can watch football on Sunday?

4. There are some people who should not be viewed in high definition...I was not prepared for Cloris Leachman sans makeup.

I'm not sure how I feel about this whole HD business. I wonder how long it will take me before I suck it up and read the directions.

It's Nubbers!

2008-11-17T22:27:00.002-06:00

I was at Hagen's Fish Market yesterday, and I saw this sign...
I have no idea why they made me laugh, but they did. Nubbers is just a funny word (say it, you'll laugh!) I also have no clue as to what type of fish is a "Nubber", but it makes me want to go fishing so I can try to catch one!

Are You Smarter Than an NFL Quarterback?

2008-11-16T18:55:00.008-06:00

Most of you know that my Sundays are spent glued to my couch watching football (btw--I have no comment on the Bears/Packers game that wouldn't be an obscene string of swear words). Today, the Eagles/Bengals game resulted in a tie. Check out this post-game interview from Donvan McNabb.

Are you freakin' kidding me?!? AAARGH!! I almost fell off my couch when I first heard the interview. He didn't know that that it could result in the tie?! "I didn't even know that was in the rule book." That's ridiculous! You can't tell me that I know more about football than an NFL quarterback (with the exception of Brian Griese, of course)! It seems like that would be critical information, for a quarterback--ya know, strategy wise?

So, Donovan, here's how it works: If at the end of the game there's a tie between two teams, there is a 5th quarter that is sudden death over time. If at the end of that quarter, no team has scored, the result is a tie. The NFL standings have 3 columns; the first marked with a W (for wins), the second with a L (for losses) and the last with a 'T' for tie. It seems rather self-explanatory, and it's been that way since 1974. Since you missed it, a tie counts as 1/2 a win and 1/2 a loss.

Finally, Donovan, Amazon.com carries both Football for Dummies and The Complete Idiot's Guide to Football, both for under $20. You may want to add one of those to your reading list.

'Tis the Season for Giving Froggies

2008-11-16T09:42:00.003-06:00

I was out and about a few places this weekend and at one of them I met Jack's chickie along with his cousin. Both seem like lovely people. At the bar we were at, the two went out to have a cigarette, and since I don't like neither second hand smoke, nor cold I choose to stay inside.

Upon their return from a smoke, they are literally dragging this guy to the table to introduce me. I hate to sound ungrateful, but I do have certain criteria on men aside from "Does he have a penis?" (Thanks, Renee). I really do appreciate the effort (good try ladies!), but I had to avoid this little "gift". I would also like to thank Jack for going big brother on him.

So, in the spirit of the up coming holidays, I've created a list, and checked it twice of just what I'm looking for--if you find one of these, feel free to put a bow on him for me:

1. There is a height requirement. To quote Barb in the sign she put on my door junior year of college, placed at the 6 foot mark: "You must be this tall to ride the Bethie." (What am I, Great America?) I'm certain it's really shallow, but I'm a tall girl and have height issues. A guy would have to be gorgeous and practically perfect in every other way for me to wave this one. To be honest, I don't think I could go much shorter than 5'10" and be comfortable. And yes, I've tried.

2. This next one is no surprise: Packer fans need not apply. If you're not a Bears fan, I can't deal with you. I also prefer Cubs fans (this guy last night had on a Sox hat-ew!), and Hawks fans. Football affiliation is also a deal breaker.

3. Non-smoker (that guy's third strike). First of all, I think it's icky. I'll spare you all the negative health effects like hairy tongues (seriously, it was in this high school health video so it must be true!) and remind people that I have asthma, I can't breathe as it is, let alone with smoke in the air.

4. Ideally, he should be in his late 20's or 30's. I hate to sound old, but I'm just not in to the same scene that I was 7 or 8 years ago.

5. I would also prefer a guy who is at least slightly athletic. Not to mention not prettier or skinnier than I (How could I date someone more high maintenance than me? If he could fit into my jeans, that's not good--I want a real man, with meat on his bones.) I have to admit, I dig the broad shoulder type--I'm just sayin'.

6. Finally, it's important for him to be kind, empathetic and a decent human being. I'd also appreciate it if he was not gropey, creepy, icky gross or on drugs. He should actually be single, be able to have a somewhat intelligent conversation, have a job, a sense of humor, and not be a total commitment-phobe. (See previous Frog Chronicles for further info on what I'm NOT to do.)

I know it's much harder to screen for the criteria in #6, but I feel they're a little more common sense--who isn't looking for those things? Besides, 1-5 are clearly hard enough for me to find.

See? I'm not that picky. :)

Skirt Wearing Froggies

2008-11-09T15:16:00.004-06:00

This morning was the Go Vertical Challenge, and the last event in my "Month of Ridiculousness" (ie, Chicago Marathon 10/12, Indianapolis Marathon 10/18, Chicago Lakefront 50/50 Ultramarathon 11/1, and the Sears Tower Climb 11/9).

I wasn't feeling well, so in an effort to cheer myself up, I wore my very cute red polka-dot running skirt for the climb. I got in line to start the climb, and this guy, who was two people in front of me was a creepy looking guy who was also wearing a skirt--I say skirt because I like kilts--and I don't want to degrade the kilt by claiming that he was wearing one! I hope that it was a sport kilt (yes, they make those), but it wasn't a tartan pattern, rather it was just army green. He turns around and says to me (over the guy between us) "Try not to look up when you're climbing, unless you want a happy surprise."

EW!! The guy between us, literally took a step backwards away from this creep. Next, the skirt wearing froggie says "Aren't you curious about what's under my kilt?"

I replied "Um, not even a little."

He leered in my direction and said "Hey, you're wearing a skirt too, looks like we've got a lot in common. Ya, know there are other things that you can climb..."

Fortunately, I saw my friend Peter farther up in the line and was able to catch his attention. I'm not even sorry for running away and cutting about 20 people in line. Thanks Peter!! You're my savior from the creepy skirt wearing froggie!!

Texting Froggies

2008-11-05T19:39:00.003-06:00

I had been chatting (email and text) with this guy for about a week. He was a Marine, worked in the fraud department for a bank downtown, ya know seemed normal. We had plans to meet for coffee, something I didn't think was a high pressure situation. I was sitting in Borders with some tea waiting for this guy to show up, when I received the following text:

"i m sorry but their appears to be a lack of spark"

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!?! You did not just stand me up with a text!! (Not to mention the incorrect use of 'their'!!) What the hell?! I would think that a Marine would have a little more class than that--or a least be able to suck it up through a cup of coffee! And to top it off, I'm mortified to think that he saw me sitting there and decided that I wasn't cute enough to sit through a cup of coffee. :(

Gettin' My Sufferage On!

2008-11-04T12:15:00.004-06:00

I headed to the polls before work this morning to exercise my 19th Amendment rights, and I was surprised that there was absolutely no lines!

I walked in to the high school using the front door and headed through the school to the gym area to the polling place. The direction from where I came had me walking in behind the election judges. As I walked over, one of the judges said to me "What time does school start?"

I gave her a funny look and replied "About an hour, why do you ask?"

To which she responded, "Is your locker over here?"

I laughed as I told her, "No, I'm not a student--I'm here to vote!!"

She was embarrassed and apologized as she directed me to the precinct room. I told her my age and she told me that I looked great--I can't believe that she actually thought I could be in high school!! LOL!

Better than Trick or Treat

2008-10-31T13:20:00.004-05:00

Before you dive in to that bag of mini Snicker's bars, here's a way to give to the hungry children of the world with out costing a dime. The site is Free Rice. You'll broaden your vocabulary and help people at the same time. By choosing the correct synonym, 20 grains of rice are donated per word. Don't worry, if vocabulary isn't your thing there are other catagories of foreign language, art and math (among others). If nothing else, it will keep your mind sharp and your fingers occupied between trick or treaters!

Enjoy!

Hand Check!

2008-10-22T23:17:00.003-05:00

It's a beautiful time of year when Baseball is playing the World Series. Football is in full swing and there's hockey to be watched. I was at BW3s over the weekend and met this guy who asked if I wanted to meet up to watch the first game of the World Series. Granted I'm not happy about the Phillies v. Rays in the game, but at least with this being the case I won't be glued to the screen and shushing him.

The date started with him being more than 30 minutes late. I was really starting to think that I was being stood up. Then he stated that he had a gift for me, which began the toothbrush flashbacks, fortunately for me it was a Cubs hat. I'm still not certain the thought process behind the gift (since he stated that he was a die hard Sox fan), but I thanked him none the less.

The date progressed ok. We had a few beers (unfortunately he had twice as many as I), made fun of the Rays, chatted...all was going fairly normal until he decided he wanted to get cozy. He suddenly slid my bar stool right next to him and put his arm around me. I hate to be a bitch, but I have a little bit of a personal bubble. Now, not so much that I can't handle close proximity, but I don't feel the need to share a bar stool with someone.

Just as I was able to get some elbow room from octopus arms, he flipped my shirt up and slid his hand up my bare back under my bra strap!!

Really? Is it necessary to do that on a first date?!?! I hate to sound like a prude, but what the crap?!?! Does something about me say that I'm that type of girl!! I was in Buffalo Wild Wings, during the top of the 8th, not a brothel!! I know we were watching baseball, but that doesn't automaticly give you licence to get to second base! BAD TOUCH!!

And then, when clearly I make my discomfort known, how does that give someone a green light to kiss me? WTF?!?! I completely missed those signals!! I'm not a huge PDA kinda person. There are some acceptable levels of PDA that don't make me uncomfortable, but hand up shirt in a restaurant during the World Series? So not ok!!

I tried to gracefully get out and to my car. The 'gentleman' (and I use that word loosely) walked me out to my car and tried to kiss me again! How is it that it's ok to keep going when I'm literally pushing you away!

I'd like to take this opportunity to thank Ford for all 260 horses that they put in my engine to get me out of there!! Now if you'll excuse me, I have to hit the shower to wash this date off me. I hope I have enough hot water. UGH!

World's Largest Personal Ad

2008-10-21T10:55:00.002-05:00

In this day and age, there are a million ways to find a date. It seems that many of them haven't worked for me...but then again, they may work for others. However, I've found one that's completely extreme. There's a woman looking to raise 3 million dollars to get an ad spot during the Superbowl. Her website, superbowlsinglegirl.com shows her story, as well as her current amount fundraised ($741.00 as of post time).

There's just soooo much wrong with all of this!! First of all, does no one else think this woman is a few fries short of a Happy Meal? I mean, CRA--ZY!! And if you're this nuts, do you think a man is really going to want to date you? (Unless he, himself, is just as loony...and then y'all shouldn't breed.) This is not the optimism of a hopeless romantic, this is insanity.

Second the Superbowl?!? Seriously, try match.com or a personal add in the paper, or even Craig's list! Most of you know that I consider Superbowl Sunday to be a holiday. I don't want this chickie to ruin my holiday!! (don't mess with my Superbowl!!) The commercials are for getting another beer, more food or using the bathroom. Not for watching the commercials (you can check those out online the next day). The focus should be on FOOTBALL!!

Does she really think this is the best method to get a guy? This is a national spot, she lives in New York, what is she going to want with Bubba in Appalachia? Maybe it's just me, but I've found that long distance never seems to work out, unless someone is going to move.

There's even different levels of giving to this cause. For $10 grand, you'll not only help this desperate woman, but you'll also get an invite to her wedding. Do you really need to pay $10,000 for a ticket to a freak show? And what of the other weirdo's that would pay that...the mayhem that could ensue!

Finally, how is this website even still running? The phrase "Superbowl" is copyrighted. Roger Goodell, where are you and your high priced lawyers to shut that site down for copyright infringement!!

I know I think this is ridiculous, and I would like this woman to be happy. But really, wouldn't it be a better use of your time to have a web site that could act as your personal add? I just don't get it...

Indianapolis Marathon

2008-10-18T15:12:00.017-05:00

This was Julia's first marathon, and I have to tell you how proud I am!! She is a total rock star!!

First of all, it was a perfect day for a marathon, about 60 degrees and mostly sunny (all though I did not care for the head wind toward the end). Unfortunately it was not a perfect marathon for me. As we were getting in to Indy, I began to feel queasy. I told Julia that I didn't feel so well. So, I rolled down Roxy's window (Julia's car's name), and realized--oh, yeah--I'm gonna barf. I completely defiled the outside of the car, and some how got vomit on my armpit (how does that happen?!?). We got to the parking lot and I felt somewhat better. After all, I have done the rainbow yawn during a training run before (on Lake Shore Drive), so I should be fine, right?

We got in to our surgical gowns (thank you, Barb!) and headed to the start. We were a little late due to the port-a-potty lines (Hoosier Potty!--say it out loud. It's funny.). Julia wanted to jump in, but I wouldn't let her...I didn't think it was a good idea to go with the 8:00 group. I think she was a little nervous, and I did everything I could to calm her down.

We began the race and even though I had spewed a 1/2 hour before the race, I felt ok (only a little nauseated). In fact, we were on perfect pace for the first 1/2 of the marathon. I knew I could make it to the first half...and at that point I was still feeling pretty good. One completely random thing, was that we saw these two guys with what seemed to be a karaoke machine crooning to the runners...guess which two celebrities they were impersonating? Oh, that would be Elvis and Meatloaf. Seriously the most bizarre combo I've seen, and the "monster ballads" they were singing only made me want to run away, not run better!

Any who, at the half the 1/2 marathoners split off and the course got really sparse. But Julia and I remained on pace, and aside from almost stepping upon squirrel road kill that freaked both of us out the race was pretty uneventful.

That is, until mile 17.

I told Julia that I was tired and needed to walk a bit and to go on with out me. The truth? I was feeling pukey again. I hurled 3 times in mile 17 (FYI--Gu looks pretty much the same going in as it does coming out). Once, near a water stop, where a paramedic asked if I wanted a ride back to the start. I responded with "No, I just want to throw up."

Y'all know me--I'm much too stubborn to not finish. And after expunging the contents of my stomach the third time I was feeling a bit better. I walked a little and continued on. I saw Julia after she had hit the turn around and she looked really good. I continued to the turn around and as I got to the sign, it blew over. Ugh!! Really? Can this race be anymore perfect!

I kept going in a walk/run. I got to the 20 telling myself--"It's a 10k--you can run a 10k--you'll be done in 1:15." By the time I got to 22, I was talking smack to the course. "4 miles--any idiot can run 4 miles!!" And finally at 23 "A 5k? Come on, you've done this drunk and hung-over!" At 24 I could feel myself really needing to push, and I remembered Elaine and her walk run plan that had helped her at Big Sur. I told myself, "One minute, you can run for 60 seconds. Then you can walk one minute."

That's what I did for the remainder of the race. (Except, I always ran any down hill). Once I hit 26, I decided I would run the last .2...and finished with a 9 minute PR time of 5:39:03 (12:56 av pace)!! Oh, yeah and upon crossing the finish line--I promptly ralphed. Fantastic.

Julia was cheering for me...until she ran over to pat my back and make sure I wasn't going to die. She kicked my ass, running her first marathon in just over 5:30. I'm so proud of her! I felt so bad I couldn't stick with her due to my yakage. I didn't want to let her down...(or hork on a marathon course, for that matter). I still think she's amazing!!

I was helping her stretch after the race, and I said "The next time I decide to do something stupid like this, remind me how AWESOME I am!!" I did it--2 Marathons in 6 days! And I PRed in both!! I can officially apply to be a Marathon Maniac!My next question: When's the next one?

Chicago Marathon 2008

2008-10-12T16:01:00.002-05:00

Ah, the Chicago Marathon. I was so pumped! It was hard to keep the first half slow and on pace...I kept being asked to slow down. For the first 7 miles or so, I had a Chicago Bears balloon. I lost that at some point. I kinda missed the "Go Bears" after it was gone. Here I am at some point...clearly it's early because I'm still smiling!But then the humidity got to me and I just couldn't keep the pace or catch my breath. I really was struggling to breathe around the United Center and then again in Pilsen. It was so hot, I took my shirt off and ran the last 7 miles in my sports bra (and ya'll know, I don't do naked in public).

Then I decided that I needed to have some fun (because isn't that what it's all about?). In Chinatown, some kind souls gave me a Budweiser, and that's when I discovered that the beer was much colder than the water or Gatorade! Then I found some guys South on Michigan Ave who were watching runners...they gave me 2 Miller Lites (one I drank with them, and one I took with me). And then some others on Michigan that traded out my empty Miller Lite for an Amstel Lite that made it across the finish. It was nice to hear people cheer "Yeah, Beer Girl!"You can see, I did finish (5:48:11--13:18 av pace), with my beer, my medal and a shiny mylar blanket (I *heart* all those things!)It was about a 10 minute PR, but I'm still glad that I get a do-over this weekend...there's supposed to be cooler weather in Indianapolis...and I get to run it with Julia! Yeah road trip! I'm also strangely proud of the fact that 1/2 of the marathon photos taken on the course have me holding a beer and running, and that my visor is coated with salt...At least you know I was having fun!!

Thank you to everyone for their support! And a special thanks to all of you who were on the course cheering for me--you rock!

My Super Hero Cheerleader

2008-10-11T20:52:00.003-05:00

Aw!! Thanks Super Julia!!
You're the best! I love the sunshine on the sign!

Marathon Party!

2008-10-10T23:54:00.001-05:00

Well, it's time to carb up for the Chicago Marathon! I had some runners over for a good ol' fashioned pasta party--complete with my student's marathon themed art work (It's unfortunate that the kids names are on the funnier ones, or I'd post them!). Here's Jack's version of carbo loading:
Crystal, Danielle and Colleen love Diet Pepsi!
Barb was really hungry!!
Running Buddies!
Everyone seems ready to go...here's hoping nature cooperates--we've all worked so hard!

Good Luck to everyone running in the 2008 Chicago Marathon!

My Furry Cheerleader

2008-10-09T09:43:00.002-05:00

This was too cute not to share...looks like Conrad will be cheering me on, all the way from Florida on Sunday! See? If a dog can make a sign for me, what's up with the rest of you?! :)

Google Goggles

2008-10-09T08:21:00.000-05:00

Google has come up with a way to help poor inebriated souls, like myself keep, from drunk emailing people. (And, let's face it--many of you have gotten at least one of these from me.) It's called Mail Goggles. Once it's set up, it asks you to complete a series of math problems with in a certain amount of time to send your email. You can even set it for times when it has to be active (like 2 am on a Saturday).

While this is genius, I have to say, what happens when I'm sober and I have to send an email? Let's face it--Math is not my friend. How the heck am I supposed to get those emails out? And if I do go for the calculator, who's to stop me from going for one when I'm wasted? I think that a logic problem might be a better control. Or one of those captia puzzle thingys. Good idea in theory...but math just might stop all email communication from me, permanently!

Cool!

2008-10-03T20:11:00.006-05:00

Yeah!! My fridge and my beer are now chilling nicely!!

With Jack's over the phone direction, I took the back panel off and found that the fan on the compressor motor was not moving. After digging around for the right tools (Finally!! I used a refrigeration ratchet!! My parents will appreciate the wonder of that one--I used to assemble them when I was a kid.) I got the fan motor off and the other Jack came by to help. We ran to the appliance repair place and one of the very nice guys there took the motor off the carriage. I had what I needed written on my hand, and all the guys in the shop made fun of me for not using paper (Hello! I did use paper--I just forgot said paper at home and had to call Jack to get the info again :D). They also cleaned and re-attached the fan and then rewired the plug. We got back (I yelled at Jack for the total cockblock) and got the motor back in.

Total cost: $51.75.

Insert "Bethie is awesome dance" here.

Ah, I think I'll drink a nice cold beer to celebrate. :)

(oh, and P.S. I also fixed the sprayer on the sink. Oh yeah!)

Still, Not Cool!

2008-10-03T16:05:00.003-05:00

Update: My fridge is still not cold, but I think I know the problem. It's the motor attached to the fan in the back bottom of the fridge.

New mission: Get motor out. Figure out where to get new motor. Replace motor.

I figure if the fridge really is broken, I can't break it any more than it already is!

Not Cool!

2008-10-02T22:22:00.005-05:00

I headed to the fridge to make some toast and I pulled a loaf of bread out of the freezer. I put it in the toaster. I started to close the bag and I realized that it was soft...

Yeah, I pulled it out of the freezer.

My fridge is dying. Not only that, my beer was getting warm.

So, I did what I had to do. I ran to the basement and got the mini fridge from college (a.k.a. The Bears Game Beer Fridge) and plugged it in. Then I started drinking the beer. I mean, I can't let it get warm (aside from in my tummy!).

Don't worry, I pitched the rest of the perishables. I'm hoping because it's about 55 to 60 in the fridge right now, most of my produce is going to be ok. Clearly, the dairy is gone (don't even ask about the mayo or ranch dressing). Oh, and don't worry about the Bailey's, Jameson and beer, I made some Irish Carbombs--and I'm not so sad about the dying fridge anymore! :)

In Running News...

2008-09-28T19:04:00.003-05:00

Since 2 weeks from today is the Chicago Marathon, I have a few running notes to post:

Melissa has, in fact, re-hydrated. She's doing well and hates the fact that I posted a picture of her in a hospital bed on the Internet for the world to see. (Yep, I am a "jerk-face", and yes, anything you do or say can be blogged against you!) But I can give her a plug, she is running the Marathon for the American Cancer Society. If you'd care to donate, click here for her donation page.
Way to go Mom! Yesterday, she participated in a 1 mile walk in honor of her service puppies. Way to put that mall walking to good use! I'm proud, mom--I think a 5k is somewhere in your future.
I also have to say, I'm proud of Amy. She finally made it OUT of the gym. For some reason she hated running outside. But she's broken away from the treadmill and found the great outdoors. She will be completing her first 1/2 Marathon the first weekend in December. You go girl! Keep up the good work!
Congrats to Dwayne! He ran his first 8k this morning. He called me after, his knees covered in IcyHot wondering just how many miles were in 8 kilometers. He said it felt like it was about five. :) So close--4.96. I told him that if he jogged to the car or to the fridge to get a beer during the Bears game, he'd be at 5. Great job, D--when are you going to run a Marathon? (No pressure.)
Finally, I'm so proud of all the Fabulous 12 Minute Mile Runner's!! You made it 17 weeks, chasing my ass up and down the Lakefront Path--that's some tough running! But seriously, It's quite a commitment you've made, and I'm very proud of all your hard work. It's been a pleasure to watch you grow as runners and it's been an honor to get to know each and every one of you. You've taught me a lot, and I thank you. I know a lot of you are running your first marathon; all I can say is, enjoy it!

That's about all for now, I have some football to watch--Go Bears!!

Who could ask for more...

2008-09-24T22:14:00.004-05:00

I had a really crappy day at school. But I have to admit there were some positives:

a hug when I needed it the most
running at the gym to blow off some steam
a new pair of fuzzy socks
a chat with a good friend
and sitting around in my underwear drinking Moose Drool and watching the Cubbie's win it in the 10th (thanks to Lee and Ramirez)

And really, what more could a girl want?

Movin' On Up!

2008-09-24T11:17:00.004-05:00

Bears Season Ticket Wait List Up-Date:

Last Season's Number: 2571
This Season's Number: 1918

To quote Homer Simpson:
"Now we play the waiting game. ------
The waiting game sucks. Let's play Hungry, Hungry Hippos!"

Frickin' Hilarious

2008-09-23T23:02:00.004-05:00

I gave a homework assignment to my fourth graders to bring in either a picture or a sketch of their favorite animal. One student was showing students his picture, saying rather loudly "It's a frickin' elephant!!"

I called him up to my desk to check his paper and he repeats "Miss B, look! It's a frickin' elephant!!" Now if you know my students, they're really not afraid to cuss in any situation, so it's highly abnormal for them to say "frickin'" instead of just dropping an f-bomb.

So, I look at his paper, and it takes every ounce within me not to laugh at this poor child. I look at him and say, "Um, sweetie. This says 'A FRICAN Elephant'."

It makes me wonder what they'd call an asian elephant.

R2R

2008-09-22T19:55:00.008-05:00

After all that carbo-loading, we were up bright and early for the 20 miler! For those of you not familiar with the route, it starts at Foster, heads up to Hollywood and then down to the South Shore Cultural Center at 71st Street. It began with some warnings (yellow/moderate), but my runners were ready to go (or at least they pretended they were)!

I of course felt the need to practice actual marathon conditions. And as you all know, this means finding beer along the course! You can see that some tailgaters gave me one...
That's right, 11.5, with Soldier Field in the back ground, and wearing a pacer's shirt...I stopped with some tailgaters to have a beer. I'm sure someone in the CARA office is very proud.

Sometime after 10:30 the flags were changed to red/high risk level. I slowed my pace down about a minute per mile for the last 5 miles, but I still finished in about 4:07. I'm so proud of all the runners in my group! They all did so well--especially in this heat!

We did have one runner go down...Melissa finished and headed straight to the medical tent. She was suffering from heat exhaustion and dehydration. We got her to the ER and 3 liters of fluid later she started to feel better. While I was pretty much useless in the medical capacity (Let's face it, I was trying not to puke every time she was stuck for an IV), I did try to entertain her by singing her songs and trying to find all the possible impressions I could do with the mylar blanket. (You'd be surprised how many you can do with that thing...Elvis, Chipotle Burrito, Batman and my personal favorite Jiffy Pop!)

Aside from the massive amounts of time in the ER and missing the Bears game it wasn't too bad of a day, it certainly was a memorable!

R2E Pasta Party

2008-09-20T22:29:00.003-05:00

Clearly I was being a social butterfly, because this is the only photo I thought to snap all night...
At least the food was good! The Fab 12's are going for it at the R2E (Ready to Eat) Pasta Party, in preparation for the R2R 20 Miler tomorrow!

Good Luck Runners!

And save the date...Friday, October 10th...Marathon Party at Casa de Bethie--BE THERE!

Froggies of the Past

2008-09-19T22:57:00.006-05:00

I bumped into a froggie I hadn't seen since High School. We did the usual small talk stuff, when he says to me:

"Ya know, I still can't believe I never asked you out."

Now, this would not have annoyed me so much if a) he didn't just say he was MARRIED and number 2) I didn't remember (very clearly) the fact that senior year he had said:

"I would have asked you out sooner, but I was afraid of what the guys on the football team would think."

I'll just let ya'll have the field day with those comments because I just don't even want to get started.

Fake Baking

2008-09-19T13:23:00.005-05:00

I hate to sound like a grinch, but when I go to a wedding reception there are two important things that I look for: Open Bar and Wedding Cake. (Clearly, I'm a woman with priorities.) Sure, I dig the whole two people are in love gettin' together thing. The first dance is lovely. I oblige and laugh at the Best Man's embarrassing speech. I run from the bouquet like it's a hand grenade. But I get all in a tissy when I see couples smashing cake in each other's faces--really, it's unnecessary and waste of perfectly good butter cream frosting! But I digress...

Anywho, when I heard about this concept, but I didn't believe it until I Googled it (and if can be found in Google, it must be true!). There is a service where you can rent a wedding cake! Apparently, the cost of baked goods have "sky rocketed" and instead of paying for a nice cake, you rent one that looks amazing, but it's made from styrofoam. Then there's a special section that has a secret compartment for the cutting of the cake part of the reception. Finally, fake cake is wheeled away and a cheaper sheet cake is served to the guests.

Now, I love wedding cake (ya'll know I have a major sweet tooth!) but you don't have to fake me out. Have a little cake that you use for the reception. Do the cake part and save the rest for your first anniversary. No biggie. I'm certain you can find a cute little thing to show off. I have no problem eating a well made sheet cake (with kick-ass frosting of course!) Don't lie to me (it makes me feel so used!)

Not that I've researched it, but really, how much does a wedding cake really cost? These fake cakes things sound expensive to me! These things start at $150.00 and the cost goes up. Plus you add the cost of the sheet cakes to the mix for your guests. Several hundred dollars for fake cake? Plus a $200 security deposit (which cracks me up--that's like insuring cigars against fire) Are you kidding me?

I want to make it clear, there is no edible part of the cake. In fact, according to the website, there's a secret compartment in the back of the cake that holds "three pieces of Twinkie(R), fit perfectly." Call me a princess, but I really don't want to indulge in a Twinkies on my wedding day (because nothin' says "I love you" like Twinkie the Kid).

This just sounds too bizarre to me...really has anyone actually seen this in real life?

From the mouths of babes...

2008-09-16T20:27:00.000-05:00

My 6th graders are studying pre-historic art. When asked to describe "Prehistoric Art" one girl wrote:

"Prehistoric art is old art. Such as cavemen art or 1997 art."

I was 18 in 1997--does that make me a cavewoman? :)

Grossness!

2008-09-09T20:10:00.007-05:00

I'm not the sort to enjoy things involving blood and guts. I won't even watch horror movies. So it amazes me that I know so many people in the medical profession. It's even more mind boggling that these very same people want to tell me their gross work stories, even though they know that the mere thought of an IV makes me gag.

It's also funny that what I consider gross for my job compared to gross for someone elses job. For example:

Gross at my job: Kid sticks red crayon up his nose.
Gross at Barb's Job: Festering, puss filled boil on ass that spurts four feet.

Gross at my job: Kid picking his nose. Not only that, he was stringing the booger out and touching it to different places on his face.
Gross at Amy's job: Finding hanging victim swinging from a tree in their back yard.

Gross at my job: Kid eats paint, paste and assorted other supplies used in that day's project.
Gross at Ken's job: Woman attacked with acid causing her body to disintegrate and turn green.

Gross at my job: Cockroaches infesting a trumpet case and running all over the band room. (OK, so it happened to Sarah, but it was still at my place of employment!!)
Gross at Melissa's job: Various medications improperly given, killing off surrounding tissue and a as a result being able to see the the person's bones.

Yuck, yuck, yuck!!

Is this a hint?

2008-09-09T08:39:00.004-05:00

First of all, I want to thank everyone for a wonderful birthday, I had a great time!

Second, I want to thank the 2 people who sent me the Philosophy Bubbly scented shower gel and the Philosophy You Are My Sunshine shower gel and lip gloss. It was a fun surprise in the mail. I have to thank you on my blog, because neither package had any note!! The Sunshine package only had a card that said "Happy Birthday, Beautiful!", and the other had none.

So, unless people are sending me a subtle hint saying "Dude!! Bethie, you really need a shower!" Thanks, whomever you are!